My first official Holy Communion as a baptized Christian. I was looking forward to it actually. 🙂 I mean I’ve had it a couple times in my life, but never really as a actual baptized Christian. I guess, its a big deal. For me. Haha! Glad to have finally taken the step to publicly declare my faith in Jesus. 🙂
So. Back in church. Slowly starting to serve again. Bit by bit. 3 musical instruments. Guitar, piano, bass. Just wanna give the best when playing for God. A little stress at the beginning. Feeling even more stress now, when I found out I have to play the guitar for the young adults’ Christmas outing carolling session, together with 4 other guitarist, who are like, super good. And I’m like, haven’t touched my guitar in 8 years and just started picking it up again this year. Argh! But I try to remind myself what someone shared with me a few weeks back. “Just do your best with what little you have, and God will be pleased.”
I remember 2 weeks back, I was playing the piano for the church’s children’s camp. Second time touching the keyboard after 8 freaking years. The first time being the practice two days before the camp. Haha. Truthfully, I didn’t think I did well at all. My playing was a little messy for the praise song, and my playing wasn’t really smooth for the worship songs. And sometimes I did wonder if God had taken away the musical talents he blessed me with. As it was stated in the Bible that if you don’t use and do anything with the talents God gave you, He will take it away from you and give it to someone else. I was lost for 8 years. And I may have found my way back, but it’s been 8 years, I put it all to waste. So yeah. I was worried God had taken it all away. But then, Sister Hannah came up to me after worship and said, “Keep playing, don’t give this up. There’s an annointing from God when you play. What you’re playing, is prophetic playing.” It was really surprising. I don’t understand exactly what she meant, but one thing I’m sure? God is Grace. And I am humbled. He hasn’t removed those talents he blessed me with.
And with whatever little I have, I will give my best to Him.
Guess what? I can confidently say, I experienced all these firsthand. Some I passed with flying colours. Others ? Epic failure. Sometimes, I just lose it. Ended up ranting to God and even putting the blame on him sometimes. Though when I’m calm and clear minded, I know He’s shaping me into a better person. But in the midst of storms and hurricane, I’m not allowed that luxury to reason with myself. And I’m a little ashamed to say, many times now, I let my faith fall off the cliff, or rather take a big dive over the cliff into the rocks below. But God never fails, even when I did. I’m glad no matter how far off the trail I go, He is able to pull me back to the right track. It doesn’t matter if it take days or weeks or months, or even years.
I’ve let myself fall deeper and deeper heading for the sharp jagged rocks for a few years now. So glad I finally managed to grab onto a rope and is now slowly climbing up back to the right path. Pretty sure God threw that rope over to me. I won’t guarantee that I won’t fail some of His tests again in the future. Actually, I’m pretty sure I’ll probably still fail at some of them. But we grow and learn. At least now, I’m gonna try even harder than before to keep my faith, believing God knows the best for me and is training me into the better person I’m supposed to be.
Being on training wheels is always hard, but it will all pay off when the wheels come off.
Sometimes we forget, sometimes we lose faith. But just remember to pick it up and go back to God.
Saw this on Joel’s blog. Simple but direct, not to mention, clear as day. A good watch, and a sounding reminder.
Doubt I’m ready for the 24-7 Prayer Challenge. But I’m definitely gonna challenge myself to pray more often in a day. =)
Decided to take a step forward after being passive for almost 4 months back in church. Signed up for the women’s conference held by the church. Glad I did. Thoroughly blessed with Pr. Dr. Lee Choo’s preaching and sharing. Besides learning a whole bunch of stuff on being a woman of God, my value as a woman, the power of God gave to women, God just did something small for me, but in an amazing way. Every time I think back, I’m still can’t help but be in awe. =) It’s been a real long while since I attended this kinda godly functions/conferences. And awkward feeling as it was, it felt great at the same time.
Godly thing aside, it was nice to have the men serve us for two days. Boy, did they do a good job. Haha. Salutes to them. And we women had a fun time playing the Amazing Race. Driving all round Air Itam and Farlim, completing missions. Under the slight drizzle at times.
Great fun. I thank God for my ‘averagely good’ skills in maths. Haha. Having to sum the 10 numbers we’re given to equal to 1. Solved the numbers puzzle in less than 10 minutes. Increased our final placing by a margin. Heh. =) My theory behind it? Anything, anything at all, multiplied by zero, equals to zero.
Great times. =) Kinda hoping they’ll continue having another women’s conference next year. =)